randomness

Don't piss me off - I'm running out of places to hide the bodies.
Hello, you've reached me. If you don't know who me is, you've dialed the wrong number.
Hi,you have just dialed 911. Normally we would ask you to state the nature of the emergency, however we're all out at lunch. If you would like to leave your name, number and emergency, we will return your call as soon as we get back. If it is a very important emergency, just go outside and scream for help. That always works pretty well in the movies. Good Luck.

Hi. Now you say something.

I can't come to the phone now, so if, well, actually, I CAN come to the phone now, I mean, like, I'm at the phone NOW, recording this message, but I'm doing this NOW, while you're listening to it LATER, except for you I guess it's NOW, like, when you're listening to it...I mean, like, wait, gosh. This is so confusing.
Eat your spinach and you'll grow up big and strong like Popeye. You'll also end up with a girlfriend that looks like Olive Oyl.

If someone annoys you, it takes 42 muscles to frown, but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and whack them in the head.

Even the smallest person can change the course of the future. - Galadriel

I'll never let go Jack, I'll never let go. - Rose in Titanic. Several seconds later, poor little Jack sinks to the bottom of the Atlantic...

I'm a woman. We don't say what we want, but we reserve the right to be pissed off if we don't get it. That's what makes us so fascinating and not just a little bit scary. - Sliding Doors

'People put you down enough, you start to believe it... the bad things are always easier to believe than the good things, ever notice that?' - Julia Roberts in Pretty Women

Auntie Em, hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog. Dorothy.

When their numbers dwindled from 50 to 8, the other dwarves began to suspect Hungry.